Don’t Give Me a Time to Be There

I have to go to the trainer in an hour. I’m hoping I did enough while I was away to not “feel it” more than usual. I stayed very active this trip, which was pretty cool for me.

I’m starting that anxiety in my belly the hour before. Does it ever go away? Do you know it could be an appointment to go out to lunch with a friend, and I’d still get that anxiety. For some reason, before I have to be somewhere at a certain time, I panic. If I was just thinking….hmmm, maybe I’ll go to the store today, nope, no anxiety. If I knew I had to be at the store at 2pm for a special sale, I’d get that feeling in my tummy.

Do you get like that? I’m not even sure when that started happening, but it’s a constant in my life now. No planned time, and I’m happy as a lark. Set an actual time for me to be somewhere, and the panic sets in about an hour before hand. It’s not “CAN’T LEAVE the HOUSE” panic, but it’s enough to make my stomach feel uneasy and have every desire and urge to call and cancel. I won’t call and cancel, but I want to. I want to in the worst way, but I won’t.